49. Surviving Stroke - Unseen Struggles and Daily Challenges Revealed

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Yo. Yo. Yo. Yo. What up. What up. What up. What up. Alright. This is episode 47 coming up in a little bit here. Just before we get started, a couple of quick notes. This episode, we talk a lot about grit.

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Came up in a couple of different areas this week in particular, but I really wanted to kinda hit on the definition of grit. Bunch of things I did so I probably should have mentioned because I had really a ton of notes. This is a big topic. It's something I'm super passionate about.

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I I really love the topic of grit from the survivor perspective, from Angela Duckworth's perspective as it relates to psychology. A lot of crossover here between real life my interest in it and kind of the the program I'm in for psychology, pursuing my master's. I think grit is a big topic.

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I saw a livestream this week with a couple of people who were talking about grit, fellow socokes, survivors.

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I think, you know, I think there's a lot of things to think about that I know. I keep saying I think. People, I believe, it's for me, it feels natural, but I also understand it may not be natural tendency for everybody, and I think that's true a lot of things in life. Right?

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Some people like this thing or that thing. Other people don't you know?

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Some people do not enjoy sports. Regardless, it's a big topic. It really became popular, I think. I've always heard about it, but it's I think Angela Duckworth's work and research over at UPenn up north.

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And the book, of course, really catapult to to a new level. You know, she's big into it. I I anyways, it's a big topic. It'll be probably this podcast will probably do at least 1 or 2 more episodes on grit. Also doing a newsletter series, with the Survivor Science blog on grit.

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You know, first, get an understanding of what it is, why it matters, what it takes, how you can develop it over time. The good news is if you don't find yourself to be particularly gritty, if you are a stroke survivor, you probably have found that you become gritty.

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It's, you know and then there's tips. We can go into that different. It's a really big topic, and we can go a ton of different ways with it. But I'm just always into it. I feel like it's it speaks to survivors. Even if you weren't particularly into it before, you might be now. Great. It's a cool topic. Lots of good stuff to talk about.

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Anyways, remember, you can go join the center, center.survivorscience.com, or you can just go over to survivorscience.com and look there up in the menu, and you'll see access to the center. Anyways, this is a really good topic. Can't wait to talk about it some more, but for now, for this week, for episode 47, please enjoy this episode starting.

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Welcome back to another episode of the Lovellsara podcast. This week 47, we are gonna be talking about one of my favorite topics. It is a passion. It is a a big fun topic.

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I'm excited about it. It's one of my favorite things to talk about. It is talking about grit and in particular, so the history of grit is second episode.

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I just love the word grit. I don't know if it's an East Coast thing, if that's do with where I grew up in Jersey and New York up on the East Coast, went to school at Miami. Which is just a word that Angela Duckworth, I think, is responsible for kind of bringing back clarity of the word itself, but so there's there's a lot of definite there's a lot of definitions. There's a lot of different things that relate to grit. Grit is also something that can be developed over time. So I'm gonna talk about kind of the history about it, introduce some of the main topics of we'll go over Angela Duckworth's stuff. She is somebody that I'm looking at her work as a stroke survivor, kind of building a little bit of a series for survivor science, like a 3 part series I'm hoping to do. I just released the first blog post on survivor science yesterday about grit, which a podcast. I just think grit is something and it's weird. I don't know how to say. It's just it's something that strikes a chord with me. It's something that motivates me. I feel like I have grittiness. I feel like a lot of us as survivors have different levels of grittiness, are also very they like to get after it. They like to do things that are hard.

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Most of us, as survivors, don't have a choice. Everything is hard, and we have to do it anyways. So, yeah, we'll talk about the GRIT score with Angela Duckworth in her book, Grit, which is a great book if you have amend it. Enjoy reading. There's also the Audible version. Even if you do enjoy reading, but just for whatever reason would rather listen to it, it's available there. Yeah. And then some we'll go into some personal stories, you know, for me and then themes.

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There's a study that I was looking at. There's a lot of studies that I'm looking at when it relates to grit and strokes of ours, some better than others. I don't have a ton of great ones for this particular episode. Some of the ones that I was looking recently in, like, past week or so were they're they're not bad studies. They're just they kinda lack a large sample size. So, again, it's a good study. I think certain studies are good and important, although I am learning this term. I think I have some strong opinions when it comes to research and the work being done in a lot of different fields, you know, but it this field, so some people may see the need for research in these few in certain areas that I just I read a lot of things in class now. I'm just, like, why is anybody researching this?

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Like, what is the benefit?

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You know, just to be a quick example before it happened to the episode.

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Awesome topic. There are things that I really wanna talk about because of the Olympics going on right now. Grit has come to the forefront again for me. I just thought it'd be a good episode to do and a good topic to write about. It's just something I'm really interested in and passionate about. What does it take to rebuild as a service? You know, I I always give this example, but, actually, I'll hold off on the study, but I do have thoughts about some of the research being done in the psychology field and perhaps why it's seen as you in terms of the science community, sometimes it's seen as a lesser scientific discipline.

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I think I know why. Because there are some things that just yeah. I don't know. I'm sure it happens in every segment of science or area, like, you know, if we're being honest, there are certain areas of science that affect everyday life and there are certain areas of science that are much more theoretical.

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So I I think you can make a case for the you can make a case to make the case for anything at any time. Yeah. Anyways okay. So let's hop into this week's episode, episode 47.

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Great. Great is something for both stroke survivor, something I think it's something that we're born with in a lot of case. I know for me, I've always been kind of a gritty guy. I don't know if that's the way I was raised or where I grew up. Again, I'm very East Coast biased.

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There's nothing I'm ashamed of or nothing I'm shy from saying.

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I do think there is I've I've been you know, when I went to Miami, I met kids from the Midwest.

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I've met people from every state in the United States, every territory, every I've met Americans abroad, overseas. I've lived in Europe.

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There is a toughness, I think, along with living in certain places. And I think that but, again, you can make the case that there are plenty of people that are less gritty and still very much East Coast bias. So the study, in particular, on grit, I don't think we'll get into this episode. Maybe if I find another one that's a little bit better, I'll share with you. I may put a link to the study that I was reading, but it did give me my wheels turning and thinking about grit and how it pertains to stroke recovery. I think really understanding grit is probably the first and foremost, the most important thing. According to Angela Duckworth and, again, this a summary, you know, Angela Duckworth in her book Grit defines it as perseverance, passion for long term goals. It's a combination that helps individuals push through challenges and achieve success.

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And, you know, success for stroke survivor looks very different, stroke survivor to stroke survivor, because I've been thinking about too, as I've been doing more writing, What is the best way to help people who are listening to the podcast? What is the best way to help people who wanna hear from stroke survivors on social media?

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And are there different areas that I can help stroke survivors? And, also, this week, I had an epiphany. It's help people who may be on the path to a stroke and not even know it. I was thinking about this because, like, on some platforms, there are lots of stroke survivors, so you could talk to other survivors because survivors often wanna hear from other survivors, what they're doing, what they're trying. That's kind of the precipice. Survivor Science and, in particular, the center over at Survivor Science, which is the online community portion, where I wanna build more community where we can share those resources and share clips and and whether it's sharing social media clips from different platforms, just different studies that we find, different different group chats. You know, maybe you're more remote in the States or abroad, and you don't have access to certain things that you really want. Part of the main reason and focus around Survivor Science Center is to break free of isolation.

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We'd all want to get back to some sense of and have our own in real life friends, in real life stroke groups.

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Those are all very necessary, but sometimes you have questions.

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The purpose of the center is really so that people can ask a question, whether you're an early riser or or more an afternoon person as it's the different chat rooms. You know, if people are online, post a thread, post a question. What's something you're trying to work on this week?

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You know, I can't think of I'm at my phone must have thousands of notes of questions that I wanna go look up after I'm at the gym every day. You know, this is, of course, over the course of but I look back at my phone sometimes, and there's still questions that I I had and I forgot I had, you know. As a survivor, I think we try to do all the things and remember all the things and, you know, sometimes it's possible. Sometimes you just get tired in a given day and you run 20 miles and you forget all the questions you had earlier in the day that you want. And so where am I going with that? You know, Angela Duckworth, SendGrid, it's it it is the combination of all those things, but I think it's even more than that. It's what you know, what is it? It is about finding, you know set 2. Right? And I think that's Tom. I think I need to get back to recording in the middle of the day where I work out half the day and get back over here to record before finishing my runs for the day because I'm finding that I'm a little bit more exhausted than I would like to be when recording the podcast. But, anyways yeah. Grid and how that applies okay. So kinda just reviewing some of my notes from the blog post yesterday. You know, Angela Duckworth is kind of the pioneer in the last couple of years for sure about, you know, bringing grit to the forefront, and I just have a lot of thoughts and feelings that I haven't really hear, but it's like again, it it consists of passion and perseverance, and I think for stroke survivors in particular, that could be difficult. In the short term, I think as stroke survivors, we all wanna get better as fast as possible. Right?

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But, really, now going into year 5, I realized that, yes, I can get better. Yes.

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I want to get better. Yes. I want to prove people wrong. Yes. I wanna get better for myself and my family. But sometimes, it is hard to keep the passion going. Sometimes, I think we can find different challenges and plateaus. And how do you how do you rise above keep pushing through that's the perseverance part. I mean, this is a really to be honest, this is a big topic, and I think we're definitely gonna have to do more than one episode due because I'm sure after I listen back to this episode, I'm gonna figure out that there were 40 other things they wanted us to say, but sometimes, it to stick through the difficult times, and I think we all encounter those strokes of errors often is it can be it can be a lot of things. It can be frustrating.

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That's not even the best word to describe it, but it can be difficult.

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You have probably it's difficult days as a survivor. It's very frustrating, even 5 years out to go over and over and keep trying. Like, it's hard one.

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Alright. Let's make it sound easier. It's hard to do the things that were so once you know, we'd we were talking about in group. It's walking. It's picking up a coffee cup. It's pouring coffees. It's to all the menial things in life that we all took for granted prior to our stroke, and those who aren't stroke servers survivor, and now it's just like it's frustrating to not be able to do the things that you so effort did once upon a time.

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And I think in the beginning for me, maybe you feel this way too, it's like in the beginning, I was frustrated. I'm annoyed, and I'm still those things, but I I'm learning to kind of these days, I think as time goes on, you just kind of realize that that that this is where grit comes in. Right? It's that stick to itiveness. It's like, okay. Yes. I used to be able to do it effortlessly and without any thought. Now everything is hard and more challenging that I'd ever wanted to be for anyone, including my but I have 2 options. I I kinda it's very much in the in the in the coaching space. We often talk about reframing things, and I I have just started to begin, again, 5 years out from my stroke. Began think about things and reframing them. And what do I mean by that?

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I mean, instead of being pissed that I can't do a thing, I just try to take that thing that I'm currently trying to do and figuring out a couple of things. I'm trying to figure how important the is this to me? Do for my suborders, I just ask for help. And then in that same moment, I'm thinking, if I ask for help, I I won't get better at doing this. So I have to decide, is this something I want to tackle right now? Is this something I should even tackle?

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Again, use your judgment here, but this is a dumb example, but I'm gonna use example, pouring hot coffee.

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Wouldn't be a problem, but I have MS. So my hands can sometimes be a little more shaky than I would like to them to be and especially get depending on the time of day. Obviously, now I tend to drink coffee in the earlier part of the day. I'm just oh, that if I'm careful and I just pay attention, doesn't mean it's not annoying. It just means I do know I can do it if I focus and pay attention. And so I'm forcing myself to do those uncomfortable things, things I once took for granted, things I never ever ever ever gave up because you just did them prior to your stroke. Now I have to think about them.

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Now I'm starting to think about them, and I'm starting to do them.

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This is not in every case. This is not doesn't apply to everything, but it's it's and it and it doesn't make it any less frustrating.

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It just me in year 5, I am starting to see okay. If I force myself to do it, I know I can do it, and I can do it safely. Cool.

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Now that I can do it safely, even if it takes me an extra 2 seconds, I can do it, and that forces me to do it and that forces me to grow. How does this relate to grit? It's doing the thing.

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This doesn't rest this doesn't necessarily correlate to the passion side of grit, but it's like, I know my passion is to get better as the structure of our. I'm not going to get I don't have a chance to get to a 100% if I don't give my a 100%.

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How do you get to a 100%? You gotta do the thing that you currently hate doing that you never gave a thought to prior to your stroke that is now a thing you have to give a thought to.

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It's just tough. It's it's annoying, but if you stick with it, eventually, it again, it is annoying even at 40, so I can only imagine if you're older an older stroke survivor. It's gotta be incredibly annoying.

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I don't know if you feel the same way. I feel like I went back at 37. I felt like a lot of my physical motor skills, a lot of the deficits I have, I feel like a 5 to 10 year old just happens to be the age of my boys.

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And I see them do it. And I get annoyed because they can almost there are certain tasks they could still do better than me. It's annoying, but I keep working at it. I don't know why. Well, I do know why. It's because I want to get better and I don't give up.

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And to me, grit is it is a combination of passion and perseverance in achieving long term goals. I guess the long term goal is to I am playing catch up. Right? Like, now, I'm 40.

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So my motor skills are on par with a 5 to 10 year old.

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They don't get better if I don't practice at all. So there are 2 choices. You can either ignore it and just never get better at it, or you can keep fighting the good fight. And I think that stick to itiveness, you know, sometime, I just I I don't like sitting on the sidelines. I heard that some from somebody, a fellow survivor. The kind of guy that wants to sit on the sidelines. I like to do things for myself. I think as true survivors, we all want that sense of independence back. Yes. There are concessions. Yes. There are things that I I you know, you do have to pick and choose, I think, at some points, but it's just yeah. Grit is really committed and focused on the goal, and my goal is to get better long term, though. It's not without obstacles. There are obstacles on it weekly, daily, monthly, yearly basis.

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I just keep pushing through. I think it makes me better. I think it makes me stronger mentally and physically, and I think, yeah, I episodes since we started the podcast, we're now in episode 47. I will never not say this, but, yeah, would rather not have a stroke. Absolutely. However, I think my mental toughness, my physical well-being actually too are some of the strongest I've ever been in I think in a lot of ways, that is the upside of having a stroke at 47 or 37. Sorry. Episode 47.

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But, again, it's not without challenges. There are there are challenges. There's days of failure and rejection, adversity, and yeah. It's not easy.

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It is annoying, especially too. Right? Some of the worst times are, like, when you're out there and you're trying to do a thing. You're trying to improve on it, and it just I I've been thinking about this because there's a new product that I just learned about yesterday. Actually, it's not new. I just have never heard of it before. Not Teams. I just I guess, I never saw it in different forums. I never heard about it for any of my therapists, and I've gone to a a number of different locations here in the Florida area to for different therapies, different groups.

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It's called the NeuroSleeve. You know, I'm not there are something I'm looking into in terms of just getting the it's it's a really cool product. If you are a Strokes Bar or know a Strokes Barre, our care caretaker yeah. The NeuroSleeve looks really promising. It's again, I can't believe I hadn't heard of it before or nobody that I known.

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And I did mention they're like, oh, this is cool. I've never heard of this. Am I gonna great. Which is incredibly frustrating, right, when you are going to rehabs and you're hoping that your rehab facilities, even if they can't give you the products or insurance won't cover it, it's nice to hear about things because you wanna know what's on the market. And it's like, they don't care. They they do. But I'm just surprised they hadn't heard about it.

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I was bringing it to them. This is not the first time. I think this happens a lot. And to be fair, it's basically so the NeuroSleeve is like a if you think of if you had an AFO, I've heard of an AFO, it have they've had a stroke or MS, in right case, both. I suffer from drop foot.

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My strengthened my legs quite a bit. I no longer use the AFO, but I still have certainly moments, days, and it comes in waves. But the nose sleeve is really promising. Or advanced piece of equipment.

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And, again, I saw the the CEO, the creator of the product on on Jerry Wald's YouTube live show, which is every Tuesday Thursdays at 11 AM EST. So if you are on YouTube, LinkedIn, which I think is Facebook, he streams to a couple even x in Twitter. Great show. Jerry's a cool guy. Really enjoyed my time on his pa on his show a couple weeks ago, last month in July.

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But the Nova Sleep, again, this is a product that I'm really looking forward to trying because it it's not insurance approved, so it is an out of pocket expense, and it requires a prescription, I believe, from your, your doctor.

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The the purpose of it is to help those who are mobile and hopefully at a wheelchair, maybe getting close to the end of the walker.

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Again, even if you have an AFO, AFO is great to get started, but you don't wanna become wholly dependent on the AFO.

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At some point, you if you're walking with an AFO, the goal is to walk pretty normal or or, you know, safely, at least, on on your own.

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This neurosleep actually What's cool about is it all those neural connections from your brain all the way down to your feet, you know, especially on your affected side, Those connections are broken. They're they're miss the things are misfiring, and it really helps. I the way I understand it as of right now, I'm kind of like between a brace and yeah.

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Not a cast, I guess. Brace would be a good cut. You know, maybe they tried to design it as kind of an if you ever seen a basketball player where those legs sleeves very similar to that, but it's got things built in where it's gets the device gets connected. So you strap it, kind of leg sleeve if you ever they seen those for runners or, again, basketball players wear them a lot now. Athletes in general wear a lot of them. But this one in particular helps with the mechanics and getting the neurons and then and all the wiring inside the leg and brain. It it helps connect all the things because one of the big things as as a runner is, like, I feel, like, sometimes there are

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48 or or for whatever reason, like, my running is good, but I know it could be better. And I've kind of been wondering this for a long time, and I knew Twayze needed time to, like, reconnect, and I probably had to do a lot of stretching and a lot of some of the mechanics. Like, I know how to do them, but my brain doesn't connect to my leg even though I know how to do them and I've worked separate exercise separate and then try to combine them. I am really, really looking forward to trying to get this device because I think it'll help the missing connections when I'm running. Because, again, I'm running, but it's, like, quite where I wanted to be, like, if that makes sense, so, like, can walk.

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This device will help you walk and run a bit. And the cool thing about it too is, from my understanding, is that you pay a little bit upfront, you pay a monthly fee, and then you continue to pay that monthly fee. I don't know for how long. I don't know if they have stories where people have used it and then wanna opt using it because it kind of was able to connect all the past. I just don't know if it's been out that long for them to have that data yet. But I am interested to see that, and I think it'd be great if they develop one for the arm as well because I've noticed that myself is that some of those connections, like, my arm has good mobility now, but some ball, which I guess is not a skill that most strokes are ever just necessarily trying to regain, but it is still a common motion, bouncing the ball. It's just a little awkward, and I the more I practice, maybe that would get better. But, yeah. It does seem like the NeuroSleeve NeuroSleeve by Scion, c I o I forget. I'll put a link in the description, but it's a really cool device. Sorry. Got way off track with grit here, but either you know, the I guess where I was going was I took a lot of grit to get 10,000 miles. It was start they became something of a passion and perseverance. I mean, I didn't think it was gonna be a passion. That's for sure. In fact, I thought it was a joke and I thought it'd be funny. I still think it's funny. I said that last week, I think. I still laugh every single day. I think to myself with multiple sclerosis.

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I ran 10,000 miles in a 21 month period.

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There isn't a lot of people better than that. There's not a lot of people that could do that. And I think that's where I was going with Grid is that for me, it's kinda built in. Like, I I don't have a choice. I wanna get back to a sense of normal for a lot of reasons because I'm younger, because I do have a longer nothing is guaranteed in life, but, theoretically, if I change all the things I have changed since since my stroke, I changed my lifestyle. I I fully anticipate barring, obviously, there's always accept you know, I I don't plan on passing away anytime soon from something that I can control. Now does that, you know, preclude me from random acts of whatever?

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No. But I'm doing everything in my power to make sure I have a long and fulfilling, you know, another 40 years of my life. Who knows? And I want to enjoy those, and I want to try to enjoy them. And running is not something I thought would be an enjoyable part of my life, but here we are because because I have that gritty attitude, because I had that fight in me, because I I just I really passionately want to get better. I or I wanna show other people they can get better. I also wanna show people it's not easy. That's another thing I've been thinking about under the sidebar from from grit here is that, like, a couple things. This also came up because I was recently approached by somebody who said they saw one of my sour story and a couple of people from in the neighborhood. Yeah. I don't know. People it's weird.

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And so I don't I don't know if people have seen to something or or or shared something or or that people have talked to each other.

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I don't know what the sudden thing is, but a couple of people have recently said to me ration I am to them. And, I found that very strange one because it's it feels weird to me when people say that for a lot of reasons. One, it just makes me feel uncomfortable.

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Although I do appreciate it, it does show me that I'm putting in the effort and time and the commitment, and it's other people, it is great to hear. I hope it is inspirational, I guess, in some ways, but I really hope it's able to inspire other stroke survivors to not give up. I hope it is inspirational in a way that people are like, oh, man. I'm not making the best choices in my life. Will is typical what you see in a stroke survivor, but I see how much work he's put into that and how much yeah, I I share my stories so that people can understand what it takes, and it takes a lot, and it's not fun. So, really, this thing that I'm thinking about more recently is, like, shifting a little bit to to the prevention side. I don't know if that's because I've been reading more studies as of school, but I I do kind of think there's no guarantee that nobody will I mean, anybody could have a stroke for any reason at any time of a lot of factors.

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You could be the healthiest person. I mean, I knew a guy that was 74, fit as a fiddle, used to run-in his seventies, ran locally here. He was, by all accounts, from from what I could tell and what we what I saw was a fairly healthy guy. Again, a runner. Seventies, very thick. You would think this is a guy who's done everything right in his seventies. He shouldn't have a stroke, but he did. I will sell you.

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Because he had done all those things, it is very apparent to me and to him now too is that he, beginning because I would see him and I'd be like, he's 70 something. How is he already, like, he seems great, and he he seemed great, like, 2 months after his stroke. And the reality is, he had put in so much work taking care of his body, taking care of his health. Yes. He was not able to you know, he had a surprise stroke as well, but he had done so much right for so long that he was able to recover much more quickly. He, you know, there may have been other factors that I'm not aware of, but because he did everything right or was doing a lot of things right prior to his stroke, he position to yes. He couldn't avoid it. It was a freak thing.

00:33:05.984 --> 00:33:20.204
It may have been older age and, you know, it could have been something heart related, maybe something he did in his younger years before he changed. It could have been just so many things. It could have been totally random. There's a lot of stroke.

00:33:21.005 --> 00:35:13.730
See? Like, there are people like myself. I mean, I had been doing a lot of bad things, but you could have been 37 and healthy and fit as a fiddle as well. Potentially, had a stroke. So but I am passionate about the fact that he and really believe that he had such a successful and quick recovery and was able to bounce back so quick. He's doing great things for his health in the first place. And where I'm going with that is I think that uncertain paths on social media, I've been trying to reach out to survivors and build more of a survivor community. But I do think in some areas and some platforms, it may be more beneficial to talk about, hey. Here's my story as a stroke survivor. And then again, I'm saying this to all you as listeners of podcasts because I think you can also do this, right, especially if you're on social media. There are great places to collaborate with other survivors who are also looking for tips or wanting to try things. There are some places, like, for example, fewer stroke survivors. Yes. We wanna promote whatever we're doing as a stroke survivor and a business owner. If you are a stroke survivor and business owner, great. I think, you know, I'm starting to realize, hey. There's this whole prevention side that I think if I had changed things sooner rather than later, again, no guarantees, but I could have made changes that would have made everything significantly easier regardless if I had the stroke or not. What do I mean by that? For me, I this is funny because it kinda ties to grit. Why does it tie to grit? I'm not a that's a great attitude to have in every facet of life unless you smoke cigarettes. Then you should be a quitter. And I'm a guy who said he would never stop smoking.

00:35:14.989 --> 00:35:33.775
I'm also a guy who never did smoke until really high school and college of when I completely stopped playing sports for the large part. And, you know, I was like, oh, I'm never gonna quit smoking. And my grandmother was 90 years old on oxygen. You know, we I I have those genetics.

00:35:34.394 --> 00:36:52.969
I'll never die from smoking. Well, I always did. And it wasn't worth it, and I don't even now I know that me having a stroke was the drastic thing I needed to quit smoking. Unfortunately, I never was able to quit smoking prior to my stroke. Let me tell you, the second I had that stroke and spent 90 days in rehab facilities inpatient doing all the work from having the stroke, by the end of that time, I I I need I now can safely say I will never smoke a cigarette the rest of my life. I thought of this thing the other day. I don't know if somebody said it before, but I just randomly had a thought. If it can ask, you should throw it in the trash. Now I know that's not the best wording, but I'm starting to think the if you eat cigarettes. If you can ash it, throw it in trash. Just trash out of your life. Get out of your life. It is. And I'm telling you this as a guy, 6 foot 8, £300, thought I was unstoppable. I still think I'm unstoppable, but I am now on unstoppable, and I will never smoke a cigarette the rest of my life. Just cut that out of your life. If if your strokes are and you've been lucky enough to survive the stroke or you know somebody who has, please, by all, it's not worth it.

00:36:53.485 --> 00:37:23.835
If you're lucky enough to live, survive the stroke, have a piece of chocolate cake every now and then, but just get rid of them. They're not good for you. They they it's it's got to be it is probably the number in number one reason that stroke is the 2nd leading cause of disability and death in the world. I'm for sure about that. You know, another big thing that you can do, obviously, is change your diet, change your lifestyle when you were I still see it in a lot of survivors, and I wanna change your diet.

00:37:23.914 --> 00:38:39.255
And I'm just thinking to myself, do you really wanna have another stroke? I mean, I know this is not a nice topic talk about, but some people maybe don't want to continue. It's it's kind of a morbid thing, but, like, I don't understand why people don't wanna change their lifestyle. You've been blessed and fortunate enough and lucky enough to survive a stroke. Why in the hell would you wanna have another one? Why would you not wanna give yourself the best chance in the world to not have another one? There's no guarantees. Right? So, like, I'm not saying you don't have a piece of cake. I'm not saying drastically immediately, but I'm saying you should start to, like, you know, I'm looking at things more often. I'm okay. Did I run 20 miles? Can I have 1 Uncrustable? Yeah. Are Uncrustables good for you? No. Not particularly. Would it be better to make a different peanut butter and jelly sandwich on a particular better bread? Yeah. Would it be better to eliminate bread altogether? Probably. You know, but there's give and takes and you could start to make small changes. You don't have to do everything overnight. In fact, we all know the the more likely you make a bunch of drastic changes, the more likely they won't stick.

00:38:41.530 --> 00:38:49.824
You know, when you think about that, it is it is is important to quit smoking.

00:38:49.824 --> 00:38:57.338
I trust me. Please believe me. I'm a guy that thought he would never quit smoking. I thought quitting was for quitters.

00:38:57.400 --> 00:39:57.105
I wasn't a quitter. I will I now look back. God, I wish I quit smoking sooner because I'm sure I had a cornucopia of bad habits and and things that were wrong with me prior to my stroke, but smoking quitting smoking now, it's just now 5 years out, I'm just like, why did I ever smoke? Like and, again, if you're having trouble quitting, talk to your doctors, talk to professionals, talk to people that can really I mean, if you reduce the number to start. Right? And then you try I'm not saying vaping is good. I'm pretty sure it's just as bad, if not worse than cigarettes, but like find tools. Talk to doctors. Talk to to other former smokers to see how you can get down. Maybe maybe the patch will work for you. I mean, I never found great success with that, but believe me, the alternative is like, you know, if, again, if you're lucky enough to be a stroke survivor, please don't keep smoking.

00:39:57.105 --> 00:41:00.190
Like, this this you just won't think your opportunity in my my you know, being as straightforward as I can be. You're you're wasting your opportunity, and it's it's a shame because there are there are a lot of people who unfortunately pass away from stroke. They don't get the second chance that you've been given. So, you know, those that have passed to to really make the most of it. And, that's something I believe in. That is what that that kind of got ties into grit. Again, if you or someone you know has high blood pressure, if you're not sure where your blood pressure is, get it checked. So easy now to hop on Amazon, get a you know, if you're bigger, they have bigger ones, bigger people. Bariatric is my the word that I hopefully no longer ever ever have to use again. Go to a doctor. Go to a facility. There are plenty of places to get tested. Do it multiple times. You know, high blood pressure is caused by a number of things. Smoking is obviously a big thing.

00:41:00.804 --> 00:41:29.269
Obesity. I'm not gonna try to tell be a health coach or tell you what to do, but I just think there are things you can do, and you can make small changes that make it seem more manageable and that allow you to make better progress over time. So, like, yes, it's not a quick fix, but think about it. If you if you eat cake every day and then you reduce your cake intake of cake to once a once a week instead of 7 days a week, well, guess what? You're gonna see benefits over that over a long time.

00:41:30.610 --> 00:42:11.824
You know, and it's the same thing. Just slowly starting to incorporate things, things you hated. Just try to eat them, try to try to, you know, if you gotta put a little sauce, fine seasonings, seasonings that are just better for you. Now there's so many apps, and, yes, it is questionable sometimes if the apps are really reliable, but, you know, I think we all know fruits and vegetables, you really you can't go wrong. I mean, I think you probably eat too much of something, but I think, in general, if you're eating, like, garbage food and then you start eating natural foods that you had to pick out at the store, You don't have to go to your local farmer's market. You can just go to your local grocery store and get healthier food.

00:42:12.525 --> 00:42:32.119
Have a banana instead of a instead of cereal, have have a banana and a yogurt. Start simple. You know? Find things that try a bunch of different yogurts. I'm not even saying yogurt's the way to go, but I'm just saying yogurt is certainly better than a bowl of chewy, crappy cereal. Also, not shaming you for having cereal.

00:42:32.739 --> 00:43:22.153
If you like cereal, have it, but have it in moderation. Just just make simple small changes. I just think there's you know? And I think you all know it as stroke survivors. You know it. There's nothing harder in the world. I think it's incredibly hard, incredibly difficult. I'm sure I am forgetting something that is much harder. But in terms of, like, you know, with with all that seems really there's nothing you can really do to control that. So I think once you get diagnosed, you are kind of on a different path. I think I I think maybe stroke is the hardest thing to have a possibility of coming back from to sort of I don't wanna say defeat. I don't I don't think you can defeat, but you can.

00:43:23.710 --> 00:43:27.489
It may be the biggest punch that you can kinda come back from.

00:43:28.750 --> 00:43:55.445
Again, I'm sure I'm not thinking of something, but it does seem like the good thing about stroke is it's not progressive. So although it will mess you up badly and could everybody has different sort of long term effects and then residual effects. Again, no guarantees, but, yeah, I think it I think it I think it probably is the hardest and and most difficult to come back from that is not a progressive disease.

00:43:56.659 --> 00:44:32.199
Again, I'm talking about it by about here. I don't know that for certain, but, something and I can't think of something that I've talked about with other people, but I'm sure there is something. Either way, it's really not a conversation. I'm just trying to tell you that it is hard. And you know that if you're a stroke survivor, whether you've been a stroke survivor for a little bit or a long time or a new stroke survivor if you're a new stroke survivor, I'm sorry to welcome you to the call. You know that this is not possible to come back from? It certainly is not impossible. Is it easy? It is absolutely not. Will it take time? Will everybody say that? They will.

00:44:32.260 --> 00:44:35.960
It does. You're hearing it now from a survivor to a survivor.

00:44:36.659 --> 00:44:39.925
Trust me. When they say it, Doesn't stop getting annoying.

00:44:40.864 --> 00:44:59.494
It does take time. You can recover slowly, but surely over time. If you are able to recover faster, that's awesome. I'm rooting for you. We're all rooting for you. I think as a survivor with other survivors, we can all say that wholeheartedly. We're all rooting for each other. We are trying to help each other.

00:45:00.755 --> 00:45:48.255
I think I think we'll talk more about grit in-depth next week on episode 48, but I will say before we wrap up, the Olympics have been amazing. It is now the middle of 2nd week. I have been enjoying the heck out of them. I will say the other thing about a strobesurrower, it came up with some of my bios in team USA. The acronym, f a a f FAFO is also something that I've thought of over the years. I never used the acronym because I would just say it to myself. But if you're not familiar with it, it's called Fuck Around and Find Out. That's sort of I love that mentality. It it kinda grit, I think, to wrap up everything in a bow, fuck around and find out is the acronym team USA has for the it's what they call themselves.

00:45:48.795 --> 00:46:14.369
It's something I've actually used over the years. I don't know if it's from my days growing up in Jersey or Miami, but I I've I've been using it forever. Never really thought of it as team name, but it it's sort of my pertains to stroke. It you know, being technically disabled and people counting me out, aisle aisle, you know, discredited or or really not discredited.

00:46:14.829 --> 00:46:36.608
Yeah. People have counted me out for a while now, and it's it's funny because back around to find out just kind of my use, I guess, outwardly shared often, but I do always think about it because I always think about it like, okay. Hey. You know, look at people looking at me and, like, some people are very nice and kind and they've they're they've made inspirational whether it's at the gym or in my neighborhood.

00:46:37.295 --> 00:48:02.014
And that's all great. They just see me working hard and they say, hey. I see you're doing well. But then there's the people that give you the side eye, and as a handicap stroke survivor also living with MS, in the back of my head is always fuck around to find out because when somebody gives me the side eye, I'm the nicest guy in the world, and I will be amazing to you until you this is not for other survivors, this is for everybody else. But I'll be looking to somebody and somebody will be the side eye whether it's at the gym or in my local, you know, area. Somebody kinda looks at me, like, especially now that I'm kind of better, but I still have a handicap pass for a lot of other reasons, you know, because I'm better, but I'm not great. But I always think in the back of my head is like, yeah. Okay. I see that side eye. I see you looking at me. And that maybe it's a 6, 8 guy in me. But I I do always think to myself, this is why I work so hard, and this is why I'm have that great perseverance and that passion to get better and help other people get better is because I think people realize I mean, go ahead and test me. Fuck around and find out because you're gonna find out that you're gonna be on the wrong side of that conversation in a lot of ways. I mean, I think people I know for me being in that wheelchair 1st year was, was really the biggest motivator. I didn't like the way people looked at me. I didn't like discounted me.

00:48:02.474 --> 00:48:20.135
I didn't like the way society treated me in a wheelchair. I think that's not I think this is a broad statement. I I think a lot of people in wheelchair is public. But, yeah, I don't know. There was something fun about that this weekend. It's it kind of ties in nicely to grit in the Olympics and, you know, it's kind of a fun acronym, I know.

00:48:20.994 --> 00:48:23.255
Do the per swear words, but so FAAFO.

00:48:25.030 --> 00:48:46.599
If you don't like me saying it, you can go Google it. You can see what it's about, but I love that team name for gymnastics team USA. Because I think gymnasts probably feel I I didn't see the origins of why they call them or how that became their nickname, but I think it's something, if I had to guess, having had both competitive gymnastics on national teams prior to them going to high school.

00:48:47.619 --> 00:49:20.150
You know, my sisters did not go to the Olympics. They were very high level prior. You know, she has probably 1 tier below qualifying for the Olympics. In fact, I think one of my sisters could have gone to a qualifier, but she's not that the time was with when she was kind of at the peak was in in between Olympics. She would have been in between the 96 Atlanta Olympics and the 2000 Sydney Olympics. So it just didn't work out for her there because there was not a Simone Simone Biles.

00:49:20.929 --> 00:49:39.170
The day it was all a much younger, tighter, compact from what I recall. So the window was so small back in the day. Anyways, that's a side topic. But I do think gymnasts have this attitude that something we should adopt as strokes to ours is that they also get discredited this you know?

00:49:41.764 --> 00:50:33.760
Because they're smaller in stature, I think they're often looked at a certain way, and I think that we as survivors are often looked at a certain way because maybe we walk funny or we talk funny or we do something, you know, or or something that other people aren't accustomed to and they think, oh, well, this person is x, y, Again, fuck around and find out. You're gonna find out you're on the wrong side of that. So I I always welcome it. I know it's something everybody does, but it's a great attitude to have regardless. Anyways, I hope you found this episode enjoyable. Real quick before we wrap up, I do wanna remind you, go to go over to center.survivorscience.com For science website, you can check out some of the latest blogs and posts there that I've hop into center. Join up. I I'd love to get some feedback on on what we're doing over there, how the onboarding experience is, how how can I improve it?

00:50:34.460 --> 00:51:54.545
Right now, it's wide open to everybody. Hopefully, down the road, it will become poor a paid community. Doors are open, so I invite you to come in. If you've listened this far, hopefully, you'll you'll join me over there and, yeah, we can start having whether it's this podcast, we we wanna be on the podcast. Do you want some just just something? I think we're gonna start building up some things on there or on the website too as survivor scientists just topics that you wanna hear about, things you ways that can help beyond just this podcast, beyond live streaming, beyond YouTube, more topics that I can really dig into deep, whether it's research based or, you know, I need to bring somebody else on to to kinda dig into it, but I'm really interested in what would be the most helpful thing to you as a survivor. As personal as you wanna make it, you can submit it to none's or I can tag you to it. I'd be happy to have you on the show as well. So up to sky's the limit. Again, go over to survivorshipcience.comorcenter.survivorscience.com to join the center. Which, again, is the online community to help us as survivors get a little more collaborative, you know, enjoyable fun space to hang out with other survivors who really know what's going on and going through it. So, anyways, hope you enjoy the rest of the Olympics. I'll be back next week with episode 48 of World War Swerve podcast.